Boys are Different than Girls

At the risk of sounding stereotypical, I have just a few gender observations from the last few weeks' activities.

The Boys' Retreat has officially closed for the year and has provided me with examples of how Jr. High boys and girls are very different:

1. Boys have a much shorter attention span. Although, I'm not sure I'll ever truly understand how they can't seem to listen to anyone for more than five minutes but can sit mesmerized by video games for hours.
   
2. Girls are more relational. They channel their energy into talking and listening to friends and adults they trust.
   
3. Neither boys or girls like "lights out", but the girls just giggle and talk all night while the boys try to kill each other and destroy anything that isn't bolted to the ground.
4. The boys think it's fun to beat the crap out of their friends. This, too, I do not understand. "Hey, you're my best friend, let me throw a ball in your face." ?
5. Girls seem to accept rules and responsibility better than the boys. Each boy tries to be an exception and gets upset when called out for it.
   
6. The boys accept room assignments better than the girls do. The boys don't seem to play the exclusivity game the way girls do. If you want to create drama at a girls' function, put a bunch of catty girls in a room with one girl they don't know or like. OMG. I never thought I'd hear a kid tell me that it wasn't Christian to put a girl she didn't know in her room. That took a lot of restraint on my part!
   

Sure, I'm a girl, so this seems a little biased. Remember that I'm talking about Jr High kids, too. I really appreciate my boys, but enjoy them on a one-on-one basis. Lately, when they get in large groups together it's a nightmare. I know that individually many of them are very bright and responsible, caring young men. I guess they just don't want the other guys to know! lol. Or maybe it's just too much Testosterone for one room.

So, now let's talk about adults:

Only women can sit in a room and watch another woman outfit her home for marriage or baby through the generosity of others. I'm sure that men could figure out there own kind of showers, but even then, I don't see a bunch of men coming to a tool party. "Hey, Ed, that is the very best crescent wrench that money can buy. Hope you enjoy it's ease of use. It saved my life." That just wouldn't happen. Guys borrow much better than women do. Guys don't need their friends to outfit the garage, because between dads, brothers, in-laws, and friends someone will have what they need. They don't care if it's used, it works!

Strip clubs really are for men. I attended a bachelorette party last night, and we made a stop at Sapphire for their male revue. I had never been to a strip club before. I will not be frequenting it. I wasn't grossed out. I was just very aware of how much they bilk you at these places. It was $25.00 to get in, lap dances (I didn't get one. I would have laughed the entire time.) were $20.00 plus tip and drinks were ridiculous. For what? Women don't really get off on seeing mostly naked men sauntering around. The only thing that I could think of was that the only guy I really wanted was my husband. One of the girls made a comment that here we were surrounded by gorgeous, well-built men and the only men we could think about were our own. So, that whole intimacy thing held up. There were horny, desperate women there who bought lap dance after lap dance. Everyone else was in a large group of girls who would egg each other on. I will say that the men did do a show in which they were sensitive to the women's mind as errogenous zone. They did all these fantasy skits before actually taking it off and going for the bills. They were really cheesy, but much better than, "Hey, ladies, look at my big package jiggling up and down." There was a lot of that, too, but it wasn't as gratuitous as I had expected.

The women's area was not too busy for a Saturday night, but as we left the room we had to walk through the men's area which was absolutely packed! There was no show. The stripper girls looked totally bored, but the men didn't care. So, it really is a visual thing. However, Don, who was at the bachelor party at a different strip club, said that all the clubs do is take your money and leave you really frustrated. We witnessed that as we were walking out and some strip club cassanova propositioned us for a lap dance. Um, sure. Dude just got all worked up watching the untouchable strippers and wants to grind on female patrons for free. What a jerk. Yuck.

Men and women in the club scene:

Next stop was Tabu Ultra Lounge at MGM. We were all totally ready to dance the night away. So, the bride and I found a spot on top of a table and started boogying down. Like strip clubs, the girls I know like to go to clubs to dance and hang with their girlfriends. It's a girl bonding thing. I have no doubt that hooking up happens every night, but not in my circle. So, Brigitte and I are having a great time dancing together and all of a sudden this drunk Mexican guy appears next to us. I guess he had been watching and decided that our hip swiveling was enough invitation. Next thing I know, this dude I have never met or spoken to in my life grabs me and tries to kiss me! Ew! I totally refused, pushed the guy away and cried to Brigitte to save me. Thankfully, she did. So, since when was dancing in the general vicinity of someone an invitation to make out? Is it a guy thing or a drunk thing? I couldn't really tell.

I think another difference between girls and guys in the social scene is that unless a girl is really out to get some action, girls have each other's back. No matter how drunk they are, girls make sure their friends are ok and accounted for. Guys aren't the same. They have a great time with you, but if you're all of a sudden not there, they assume you went off and got lucky or went home. They don't really worry about where you really are or if you're ok. I know, that's a big generalization. I'm just basing it on the collective experience of last night.

Also, women are more selective and catty about which girls they'll go out with or not whereas men seem to operate under the more the merrier idea. It's probably because men just don't get into the stupid drama like women do. Good for you!

So, there are my observations and generalizations about my experiences with men and women recently.