Shared Experience
Ever have one of those blast-from-the-past experiences that you want to share, but the only people who would really appreciate it are the people who were involved in the original experience? Confused yet? It's like the church trip to Mexico; I can go on and on about the splendor of Motel Sanchez, but only the people who have also been on the Mexico trip really understand and envision our favorite one star motel. Oh, the dirty bathroom floors and hard beds. Not to mention Mexican hombres hanging around outside at night. Another one is that only my cousins truly understand the PeeWee's Big Adventure obsession, because we were all in it together. Anyway... I recently had a moment that took me back that two of my friends from high school would truly appreciate. Not that that's going to stop me! I was at Petco buying food for Dobby, and I noticed that there was a new store in the shopping center. The store just happens to be owned by a woman that my friends and I knew during high school. We actually got a lot of mileage out of how weird and mean we thought she and her daughter were. At the time, we knew that the woman had been a clown/mime in her previous life but had been dealt a few hard knocks which forced her to do more practical things with her life. Fast forward a few years, we are all out of school and I am getting ready to be married and I run into this woman at the Bridal Spectacular. She had a booth specializing in Renaissance wedding dresses. Hey, some people do that whole theme wedding thing. After that, I kept running into this woman everywhere! She was at every craft fair and the Magical Forest. I couldn't get away from her, and I was getting tired of small talk all the time! Well, people must be buying her costumes, because now she has her own costume store. That's pretty cool. Unfortunately, the only people who would care much about this new development I haven't heard from in almost two years!
How does that happen? How do we lose track of friends and not even mean to? Sure, there are a lot of people from high school that I am fine with never seeing again. I'm sure that there are going to be a few I'll see at my reunion in a few years that I'll have to bite my tongue from saying, "Um... where the hell have you been these past ten years?!" One of these is my childhood best friend that I haven't crossed paths with since my sophomore year of college. I invited her entire family to our wedding and they didn't even send back the RSVP card with a regret. Fine, screw you, too! I just gave up after that figuring that I was the only one who really cared about continuing our relationship. It's too bad, because she might really enjoy the person I am today. I guess I'll find out in '07. Those of us who have been out of high school for a while probably know that it is very unrealistic to have more than a few if any high school friendships that survive the test of time. How long do you continue to try to keep in touch with people? Does there come a point when it's just not worth the effort anymore if it isn't reciprocated? Who knows, maybe someday you'll reconnect at the Adult Superstore. lol. Honestly, the friends I have made since high school have much more in common with me and care a lot more about my life and having fun together than anyone I knew back then.
I've gone through this experience with family members, too. One of my cousins and I were totally inseperable during childhood. Of course, adolescence came and made us two very different people, so we have almost no relationship today. My mom just called a few minutes ago and told me that Kellie is going to Texas to complete basic training and will then be shipped off to Baghdad. See, two very different people. My mom was urging me to call her, but what in the world am I supposed to say to someone who has made absolutely no effort to have an adult relationship? "Well, have fun. I'll look for ya' on the evening news." I don't even have her phone number! Sure, I care about her safety like I would any family member, but is a college education really worth risking your life? I respect all of our troops and the great work they do, but the Kellie I knew wasn't exactly the G.I. Jane type. Maybe I would know different if we had more of a relationship today than third hand information. Oh, well. Change is inevitable, and I have great stories and experiences that I share with a lot of people still.
How does that happen? How do we lose track of friends and not even mean to? Sure, there are a lot of people from high school that I am fine with never seeing again. I'm sure that there are going to be a few I'll see at my reunion in a few years that I'll have to bite my tongue from saying, "Um... where the hell have you been these past ten years?!" One of these is my childhood best friend that I haven't crossed paths with since my sophomore year of college. I invited her entire family to our wedding and they didn't even send back the RSVP card with a regret. Fine, screw you, too! I just gave up after that figuring that I was the only one who really cared about continuing our relationship. It's too bad, because she might really enjoy the person I am today. I guess I'll find out in '07. Those of us who have been out of high school for a while probably know that it is very unrealistic to have more than a few if any high school friendships that survive the test of time. How long do you continue to try to keep in touch with people? Does there come a point when it's just not worth the effort anymore if it isn't reciprocated? Who knows, maybe someday you'll reconnect at the Adult Superstore. lol. Honestly, the friends I have made since high school have much more in common with me and care a lot more about my life and having fun together than anyone I knew back then.
I've gone through this experience with family members, too. One of my cousins and I were totally inseperable during childhood. Of course, adolescence came and made us two very different people, so we have almost no relationship today. My mom just called a few minutes ago and told me that Kellie is going to Texas to complete basic training and will then be shipped off to Baghdad. See, two very different people. My mom was urging me to call her, but what in the world am I supposed to say to someone who has made absolutely no effort to have an adult relationship? "Well, have fun. I'll look for ya' on the evening news." I don't even have her phone number! Sure, I care about her safety like I would any family member, but is a college education really worth risking your life? I respect all of our troops and the great work they do, but the Kellie I knew wasn't exactly the G.I. Jane type. Maybe I would know different if we had more of a relationship today than third hand information. Oh, well. Change is inevitable, and I have great stories and experiences that I share with a lot of people still.
posted by Unknown at 2:35 PM
4 Comments:
wow. i totally understand about the losing touch with people thing. I'm sure your friend didn't intentionally snub you at the wedding, although maybe she did...who knows? I just know from experience that often it is just communication miscues; its like you forget to write back once, and so the other person doesn't want to seem pushy, so they are still waiting for your response, but in the meantime you are waiting for their response (cuz you forgot it was actually your turn) and as time goes on, you just start to think negatively towards that person, thinking "fine, I can do without" or whatev. and they start thinking the same thing...etc, etc. fubar. anyways, I 've experienced that myself. so i can relate. i guess we all just have to take solace in the friends we do still have, making the time to create new connections with people and always being open to those people that have fallen by the wayside. like i said, in most cases it probably wasn't an intentional falling out anyways. Life just got in the way. :) Its all good Des. We're still friends. :) By the way, what IS the deal with Pee Wee's big adventure? that movie is uber creepy still.
I haven't even been out of high school that long, but I already barely talk to anyone from it. My best friends and fiance are from high school, but I have lost touch with so many. A lot of times, I also feel weird talking to people from that time. I have nothing in common with most of them anymore. I have had several awkward moments bumping into people from high school.
PeeWee is sooo awesome! How did you miss it, Mike. Hey, and when did we have a falling out, other than maybe when we were 16? Is there some long harboring hostility I don't know about? Is that really why you're in Reno leaving your poor mom to cry over you every night? Aw, ya' know I'm kidding.
ugh. whatevah. you know exactly which falling out Im talking about. no, I'm just kidding, there never was one. but if you keep trying to make me feel guilty about mom crying, we might have one :) and on the pee wee thing. Large Marge freaked me out. and the scary clown doctors? helllooo? what a horrible thing to put in a kids movie. Although that movie did give us the bartop tequila dance, and the phrase "I know you are but what am I?" so i guess it wasn't all bad.
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